A photo of some papers of yours I tore to shreds just weeks after the incident. You stated how awful it was of me and how petty I was. And you are right. So for that, I apologize. But I think given what I had just dealt with, Ill have some grace and forgive myself.
Survivor Story: Four Years On – A Letter to My Abuser
You cannot play the victim when you were the perpetrator in every sense of the word. I used to cry in pain and agony, praying one day you would apologize for what you put me through. I used to think if you apologized, it would somehow relieve me of the baggage I obtained during our relationship. However, as I have grown and healed, I have not only realized that I do not need an apology from you, but that even if you did provide one, it would mean absolutely nothing. That aside, I do not believe that you are sorry for anything.
Trigger warning: This article contains details about sexual assault and harassment which may be triggering to survivors. Being a trusted driver in our family for almost 25 years, no one questioned your integrity when it came to leaving me alone with you. Watching my father give you respect — the way he did with my grandfather — I learned to respect you too.
Updated: Oct 6, The act of forgiving seems easy, but forgiving someone that abused you more than once is way more complex than one might believe. Many survivors, including myself, struggle with resentment; they are unable to forgive their abuser. And forgiveness is a unique tool that will help you on your path to healing. As simple as this sounds, it can be incredibly challenging for survivors of abuse to acknowledge the abuse via writing because they may feel that it would be like reliving the abuse in their heads all over again. To My Abusive Ex-Husband,. Five years ago, you physically abused me for the first time.